With the rise of social media, the opportunities for married people to cheat on their partners are plentiful.
Instead of working through issues, people now have the option of simply sliding into someone else’s DMs to find the attention they are looking for.
Once upon a time, a man might have thought he had met the woman of his dreams, his twin flame, or soul mate, and that she was uniquely designed especially for him.
But now, there is a world of women at his disposal, and he can easily find fault in his wife when comparing her with other women. Even more, a man might start to believe that there is a world of potential partners out there waiting for him and develop a fear of missing out (FOMO).
The endless number of people, both real and fake on social media requires discernment and discipline by both partners but all too often, people fail to address common marital problems and turn to the low-hanging fruit of social media in an effort to meet their needs. Men, in particular, start doing certain things on social media when they are feeling unhappy in their marriage.
Three Yourtango experts share the social media habits that reveal a man is unsatisfied in her relationship:
1. Constantly liking other women’s photos
“It’s perfectly normal to look at other people when you’re married but if your husband is always the first one to like every Instagram model’s post, we might have a problem. Viewing and liking aren’t always an issue. Commenting and direct messages can be. It also says a lot about how we feel about the people in our lives when we see something that evokes a positive emotion, who do we choose to share it with?
— Erika Jordan, Love Coach, NLP
2. Spending excessive time online
“Spending more time online than in the actual relationship. Engaging more with new potential partners on social media than with his current partner.”
— Cassady Cayne, Love & Relationship Coach
3. Connecting with other women online
“When we are unhappy with a relationship, we automatically look for alternatives as we want to be happy. This expresses itself in social media use by looking for meetings, activities, and places to connect with other women – socially or otherwise where the spouse won’t go. When more desperately unhappy, husbands may search for alternative dating sites, even porn to take love into their own hands.”
— Fritz George Sauer, Stress Expert, Author, & Coach
Protecting your marriage from the pitfalls of social media requires commitment from both partners.
When it comes to the digital world, the temptation is everywhere. It’s much more of a heavy lift to sit down, listen to your wife, and come up with effective solutions to your marital woes than it is to strike up a conversation with a woman who knows nothing about your flaws and nuances.
A new prospect may be more susceptible to your charm than your wife, who knows you better than anyone and is usually balancing her life experiences with you and the ideological man she fell in love with.
In order for a married person to avoid the pitfalls of being on social media during difficult times, there should be clear and compassionate communication and understanding, consideration of one another’s feelings, discipline, and an understanding of the big picture.
Things that are meant to be are usually not easy, so do the work in your marriage and protect it at all costs.
NyRee Ausler is a writer from Seattle, Washington. She covers lifestyle, relationship, and human-interest stories that readers can relate to and that bring social issues to the forefront for discussion.
